Inconspicuous Homeland

Last time I went to visit old relatives of granny who live in the suburbs, about 40 minutes from home, and for the outfits I decided to pick some clothes that can be related to the certain atmosphere of my own country in the old days. It's pretty confusing, though... All this time I've been really in love and influenced by the vintage fashion from the Europe or America, which are truly fascinating. The bad side of that is the fact that I don't know much about my own continental style... and I don't feel comfortable with my lack of understanding. I'm an Indonesian - even I inherited Chinese descendant from my mom - but my father is fully Javanese and so his family. I grew up in Java, Indonesia - and still living there - so I can't find any defences that could release myself from this devoid of (some sort of) nationality. At least I should know how to apply the clothes on myself based on my social comprehension of Indonesia.

So in sudden I remember that there will be some old buildings in the suburban area, and they were built during the colonial era - by the Dutch, to be spesific. The buildings somehow abstract the sense of complicated despondency during that time. I'm a student, so I tried to imagine how was it feel to be one in the colonization era. I think being the academics in some kind of situation were quite hard. By social classification, their position were in the middle - between the state and the civils. They were the pseudo internees - free to study and have enough money to eat, but their country was taken over by strangers - and their brothers, the common populace and proletarians; were forced to suffer in destitution and horrid life. It was only fake, manipulative freedom. By heart, they - as other Indonesians - were detained.

It was crazy, to only think about it. Me and every Indonesian should really be grateful for not experiencing the colonial reign period. And maybe everyone who can call themselves as free-person too. We play computers and browse the internet with music screaming aloud from the private I-phones while our predecessor were gambling their life only for the claim of free-self. And this morning I was complaining about my slow-loading PC! I feel a bit selfish.

We've been taught about our country histories for many years, but for me, it will never be enough. Every repetition is useless unless I try to being more conscious of its meaning... The core meaning of being one free creature in the universe. How about now? Am I a free person? What is a free person? Do we all really free? What is freedom anyway? The elucidation of it will take a lifetime, probably - it's a process, it's a journey, it's a walk of finding yourself... Well, alright, jump off from that, I think my outfits were so simple (a bit like usual). I didn't know exactly why I pick those clothes but I remember that I was looking for a nice pair of shirt and skirt that can reflect the Indonesian hospitality. But as a note, these photos and my certain style are not fully representing Indonesian cultures - it just my personal style. Indonesia itself has tremendeous, diverse culture from its multiple tribes and race. We have about 13 thousands island spreaded over the archipelago and every part of our country is unique and special. Someday I'll write about them,I promise.

Photos, as always, by Elang.

Vintage white stripped shirt : belongs to my grandma's sister, from 1943.

Vintage white hem skirt : thrifted, local store.

Vintage black leather shoes : thrifted, Vintage Loaine.

Yellow adjustable belt : Miami Beach

Ivory bangle and brown beads bracelet : thrifted and handmade.

Brown leather messenger bag : thrifted.

Small straw handbag : some market in Bali.

Book : The Greek Myth vol. I

However, it was a nice sunny day and I had such wonderful time there. Old buildings are lovely and such great places to read, too. Oh and I tried to do my hair with some classic braid style (big thanks for Aya of Strawberry Koi for her Heidi Braid tutorial!) like the most previous school girl or teachers did for their hair, but sorry I forgot to take any closer images of it. Today I'm a happy to get brighter view of freedom, and it's also nice to share a short story about my country to you. Last, I really need to say thank you for everyone who had given such amazing and kind responses on my post - I can't check the comments really often because I have class in the afternoon to attend, but everytime I open my blog to write new post I got surprised by many beautiful comments that you all have left here. I'll try to reply each comment, but since longer time will be needed to accomplished that, please don't think I don't appreciate your visit - I just need particular time to give feedback. And I still always walking through everyone's blog! I'll see you on the next post. Sampai jumpa lagi*!

(*it means 'See You Again' in Indonesian)